Tag: Guns

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So, I Have Tennis Elbow …

I don’t play tennis. I was about to declare that I know nothing about tennis, but then I stopped myself, because I’ve read Infinite Jest, by David Foster Wallace, and if I still knew nothing about tennis after reading Infinite Jest, I’d be an idiot. 

I acquired my case of tennis elbow by way of gripping my steering wheel too tightly while fighting a fit of intense road rage  — multiple days in a row. Oh, fuck it, let’s be honest — every damned day for multiple weeks in a row. The entire fucking city is under construction, it does no good to avoid the main route, because all the alternate routes are fucked up, too. It happened in my left arm, because that’s the arm gripping the steering wheel while my right hand shifts gears. I drive a manual, because that’s just one more thing I can have control of when I’m behind the wheel. But let’s move past that, because manual transmissions and my control issues are two things that could each have a series of blogs unto themselves. 

So, the long and the short of it is, I let a bunch of idiots get me so very mad that I actually physically injured myself. It fucked up my push up challenge. It’s fucking up my fitness goals in general, and that’s just the one symptom, the tennis elbow. There are more serious symptoms. My blood pressure, my general heart health, and my state of mind, are three very important examples. These are all very good reasons to stop having road rage. These are good reasons to just relax when I drive, to not let stupid people get under my skin, because, fuck ,everyone knows, they are EVERYFUCKINGWHERE. So just relax, Guy, take it easy. 

Sounds so easy. I know the anger hurts nobody but myself, and it does hurt me, obviously. Yet I still get triggered. I know, I know. I hate that fucking word, too. But it’s accurate, and valid. I have triggers, and when they are pulled, it is extremely difficult to stop the bullet from coming out of the gun. I literally have milliseconds to realize what’s about to happen and stop it when I get triggered. I usually fail. And once the bullet is out of the gun, it has to continue it’s trajectory until it loses steam and falls to earth — or collides with something, causing catastrophic damage. 

So, I am actually something it is very dangerous to be right now. I am an angry white male with mental health issues who owns guns. Don’t worry, I’m not going to go shooting some place up. That would run directly counter to my two main life goals, freedom and longevity. I have no intention of going to jail or dying, and those are the only two outcomes of going on a shooting spree. Personally, I think that’s one too many options. I think all mass shooters should be killed on sight, it is the sole instance where I support unnecessary force by law enforcement. Take the shooter out, they don’t deserve to see their names in the paper. 

Anyway, I don’t want to be angry. I am smart enough to know the nonsense of it. I want to be chill and easy going. I want to go with the flow, take life as it comes. I lived that way for a while. It was bliss. I don’t know what happened. I lost it somehow. But I’m trying to get back there. I’m trying to remember how to let go. Let go of my perceived control. Let go of trying to predict what’s next and just wait and see. Let go of expectations. Let go of worry. Let go of regret. Let go of the fucking steering wheel.

So I’ve been using a heating pad and doing some recommended stretches to try to heal up these tendons faster but it doesn’t seem to be working. I’m probably going to have to get either a wrist brace or an elbow brace. With tennis elbow, the problem starts with the wrist muscles and then damages the tendons in the elbow, so the treatment lies in the wrist. The elbow brace is weighted and is worn on the forearm. It takes the pressure off the tendons when the muscles are used. 

For now, I’ve been trying to avoid using my left hand and arm. As a right-handed person, I sure use my left hand for a lot of things I need to avoid. Including: opening doors, pulling my car door shut, picking up my backpack, picking up bags of groceries, picking up anything, really, pulling up my jeans, taking off my jeans, putting sheets on the bed, and just about everything else. When I forget, and I grab a grip of something with my left hand, my elbow screams. 

I just want this to heal so I can get back to my push ups. It will heal faster if I can stop clenching all my muscles every time I’m triggered. The anger is a part of my anxiety. I need to get a handle on my anxiety.  I really don’t want to take pills … 

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We Should Grieve and Move On

I think people should shut the fuck up about guns right now. I’m for sensible gun reform, sure, of course. It’s something we, as a country need to do. But it’s not going to happen with Donald Trump in the White House and a Senate full of Republicans

It’s not going to happen unless there is a Democrat in the White House and they have the majority in both the Senate and the House. And, quite frankly, talking about gun reform leading up the the election is not going to help make that happen. It is a wedge issue and it is not an issue that is going to turn out favorably for the Democrats in the general election. 

These mass shootings are horrific. The motivations are horrific. The senseless loss of life is heartbreaking and the ease with which we can all obtain weapons capable of killing dozens of people in mere seconds is pretty scary. 

But the people you’re trying to convince already agree with you, and the ones who don’t aren’t going to. The Democrats shouldn’t run on this issue, and despite the horrible recent tragedies, it’s not what people should be talking about right now. The way to honor the deceased and to prevent future tragedies is to get new people elected by any means necessary. And that means not making guns an issue during the election.

Democrats should get themselves elected on other issues, and then do the gun stuff once they are in. It won’t be easy for them even then, because there will be a whole lot of debate within their own party about how far they really want to go. But that will be the time for all this gun debate. When we have a government who will actually try to do something about it. 

Ah, that would be nice. Lol. If we lived in that kind of reasonable world, where people really understood how to politic. But, nope. Not here, not now. This is Earth, 2019, Kiddies, and we are so very fucked. So, you might as well just sit back, enjoy the ride, and hope we don’t all blow up before this shitstorm is over. 

I just keep watching Trump and his army of alt-right trolls set political traps for the left and  then I just watch the left, pretty much collectively, wander right into the traps, and not seem to even know they’re getting caught. Trump wants this election to be about race and guns. And he’s getting his wish. And the Left, pretty much collectively, is going to lose so fucking hard. 

So I’m not getting emotionally invested. I’m going to do my part and I’m going to vote in the Primary and I’m going to vote in the General, and both votes are going to be calculated and cast in a way in which I believe will be the most likely to get Trump out of office. And that’s all I can do. That’s all anyone can do. 

Getting mad at people on the Internet and yelling at them, telling them they’re stupid, telling them they’re racist, homophobic, xenophobic (okay, but, really, who isn’t xenophobic? I mean Xenomorphs are fucking TERRIFYING. Oh, what? That’s not what … oh, I see, nevermind), misogynistic, or whatever else we’re accusing people of at the drop of a hat these days.

I mean, yeah, sure, some people are all these things. The world is full of haters. Homophobes, misogynists, and racists, oh my! They’re everywhere, and they suck. But sometimes … a lot of times … someone just asks an innocent question, or happens to have a different take on race relations than someone else, and they’re shouted down as a bigot. Call me crazy, but I don’t really think that’s a very smart way to try to get someone to vote for your guy (or girl). But, hey, what do I know?

But I’ve digressed, wandered off on a tangent, as I’m prone to do. Bringing it back around, another thing that’s not going to get them to vote for your guy is telling them you want to take their guns away. It doesn’t matter how sensibly you try to frame it, all they hear is that you want to take their guns away. Do you want to take their guns away? Because that’s not how you take their guns away. 

Instead, don’t talk about guns. Talk about the other issues that matter, issues that affect their every day lives. The way to beat Trump would be to make it so that nobody was talking about guns, or race, or misogyny, or homophobia on election day. 

But that’s fucking crazy. Because this is America. So, sit back, watch the shit show, and don’t let it get your blood pressure up. That’s my advice. Because this is going to be a bumpy ride and the landing is probably going to suck.